This new lifestyle of mine is finally beginning to work. It took an hour this morning to get dressed. Shower, exercises, clearing, leggings, then clothes. I will have to do the clearing and exercises at least once more today. Also the massage which means taking the leggings off and putting them back on. Unless I wait til bedtime to do the massage.
Mike and I have been discussing this a lot. There is another piece of equipment they are trying to get approved through the insurance. It will take another 2 hours everyday to complete the therapy with that.
On a day that I was feeling miserable with all this, I told Mike I just can't say "thank you" to God for any of it. I can't find a way to praise Him for this. Especially when it takes a good portion of my day dealing with it. It is ugly, cumbersome and hot. Plus I have more to wear! You know those compression pants the football players wear? Yep, I need a pair of those in my size. But back to this. I can sing when I have to, but it is not joyful. I've prayed and hollered and prayed some more. But I just cannot praise the God of my life and salvation for this condition of lymphedema. I don't need another thing to add to my ever growing list.
Then Mike, my dear, sweet, loving husband responded. He told me I don't have to praise God for this storm in my life, but praise Him IN this storm. I don't have to thank God for my conditions, but thank Him for the good in my life. I know, I've been a Christian a long time. I should have known this. I should have been able to see it myself. But I didn't. I think I was just too angry.
I sing now with joy in my heart because I know sometime in the future God will show me all His glories. I look forward to Heaven. I'm not ready to go there, but I look forward to it.
I will praise Him - IN THIS STORM, not for the storm. I WILL thank Him for all the good I have. I don't have to thank Him for the myriad of health issues, but I can thank Him that my heart is healthy. I can thank Him that I don't have cancer. I can thank Him for my children, grandchildren, my mother, and more than those, I can and do thank Him for my husband. He is truly my helpmeet. He holds me while I cry. He laughs at me when I am goofy because of my meds. He helps me with my compression gear when he is around. He helps me with the household chores that I should be doing, but can't.
Lord God above, thank you so much for giving me Mike. You knew the kind of man I needed long before I knew I needed him. I love my husband evermore everyday.